Make peace with all the women you once were.
Lay flowers at their feet.
Offer them incense and honey and forgiveness.
Honour them and give them your silence.
Listen. Bless them and let them be.
For they are the bones of the temple you sit in now.
For they are the rivers of wisdom leading you toward the sea.
I read these lines on the internet and they spoke to me in a million ways. I have come across conversations with people who speak confidently of self-love, who lead boardroom discussions, who are successful achievers and leaders, yet in their quiet moments and in rooms that they know will not judge, they speak of the burden of broken dreams, unfulfilled desires and big compromises. The worldly luxuries are darkened in a heart that has forgotten to sing. You buy more, you acquire more and yet after a few moments of happiness, you are empty again.
Making peace with yourself is a responsibility and it can come only when the soul is truly free. Often, in meeting the world’s metrics of success, we forget who we really are or what is the calling that makes us come alive. We struggle to meet the expectations of parents, spouses, society and are so habituated that we pass on the same values to the young in our families.
Women, especially, have the tendency to suppress their needs and wants. We tend to water down our potential. We could be more intelligent, stronger, courageous or skilled but our gender stands in the way of the opportunities before us. We are taught not to shine our light or amplify our success because the men in our lives may not handle it. And yet, we are asked why are there not enough women in leadership in politics, business, government and even, spirituality.
Women leadership decisions are critically heard, the respect she earns in her career often comes at the cost of her family, her opinion hardly makes it to newspaper headlines on important national and international issues, and while she makes up half of the world, her representation in important forums comes with the word, inclusion.
Women with strong opinions are perceived to be loud and aggressive, women who hold leadership ambitions are considered un-feminine, a woman who has lost her husband or is divorced or chosen to stay single is seen as flawed and a woman who is infertile is considered inauspicious. She loses bits and pieces of herself becoming everything but herself. And sometimes in her quiet moments, she looks in the mirror trying to find the person she once wanted to be.
While you cannot change the past for that time is gone, neither must you live with regret, shame or guilt. You did what you had to then but now is an opportunity, now is a choice, now is the time to learn, to be free, to build and to grow. Now is the time to understand that you can truly give to others only what you have inside of you. Inside of you is this immense human who holds the gift of self-love, acceptance, healing, freedom and light. As we celebrate the month of love, may you hold the power and insight to begin the journey inside.
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