Love is complicated and so are relationships. But most of us just assume that love is all unicorns and rainbows and that’s just far from the truth. While many of us manage to navigate through our relationship, it’s not such a smooth ride for everyone. A lot of people face challenges to the point that they break down. What’s to know is that like with everything else in life, relationships need effort, time and commitment. Its okay to not be okay all the time. And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with seeking help. There is a lot of stigma around couples counselling or couples therapy but it’s also important to understand that you don’t have to feel shameful or guilty if you are not able to manage things on your own. Instead of becoming miserable, parting ways, or living in a toxic and unhealthy situation, its important to see the signs, understand it and work on your relationship. Here are some indicators you should look out for:
YOU HAVE TRUST ISSUES
The foundation of every relationship is based on trust and if you feel like you cannot trust your partner, what is even the point? As partners, you have to have faith in each other and be able to depend on each other and if you are not on the same team, things are not going in the right direction.
YOU KEEP SECRETS
Everyone has the right to privacy but as a couple, some secrets can destroy your relationship. Be it your finances, friendships or who and where you spend your time with, keeping things from your partner is not right and is a breach of trust in relationships.
COMMUNICATION IS A PROBLEM
There are various kinds of communication problems ranging from normal to severe and it’s essential that you understand when to seek help. If the quality and quantity of your interaction drops and makes it difficult for you to reach out to your partner or if you are walking on eggshells around each other and are scared of communicating, you probably need couples counselling. In case, your conversations end in a fight or if you have completely stopped communicating with each other, things are getting serious and it’s time to get the help you need now.
It’s normal for couples to face challenges and ups and downs in their relationship but if you have unresolved arguments and end up fighting about the same old issues again and again, it’s a sign that your relationship needs help. If you have ongoing issues that you are unable to resolve, it’s a good idea to seek professional help and be able to learn new and more effective ways to communicate and resolve conflicts while finding healthy common ground with your partner to keep things going and work through the issues.
Intimacy is not just about sex. It is also about something as simple as hugging, cuddling or kissing. Of course, lack of sex is a huge sign of trouble but sometimes that’s just a phase. But if there is a lack of romance or intimacy in your relationship, that’s a cause for concern. And if your sex life takes a hit for a long time, it’s definitely time to sort out your issues with your partner.
AFFAIR BECOMES AN OPTION
If there is a lack of sex, intimacy, romance and bonding with your partner, it becomes easy to think about finding it elsewhere. If you are thinking about having an affair, be it emotional or physical, it’s a sign that you need to seek professional help to resolve issues in your relationship. It’s normal to have a fantasy or a crush or even an infatuation but if you are having an affair or considering having one, it’s important you open up to your partner and go for couples counselling. Infidelity is never healthy or a solution to a problem.